Sunday, 18 December 2016

The 3 Biggest Fears Stopping Progress and Change

By Matt Crane

With the current state of our society, the violence, the hate being promoted and the unrest of the world and it’s relationships with one another, one could say that we should all be worried. One could say that, but for some that wouldn’t be the case.

You see businesses are being created virtually every minute, millions are being generated almost overnight by many, and the economy, while always volatile, is being reported very positively. What I’m seeing here is that for some it’s not going to be FEAR that rules but activity; however, for most that simply isn’t the case.

Based on the current state of affairs that the majority of human beings face in the world today one could argue that many have either settled on their current situation or have given up on their hopes and dreams.

When I see so many reactions and in some cases, overreactions, I see a much deeper answer than that of the one we get thrown from the nightly news, online headlines, and/or social media posts.

Check out the three main fears that I see as ruling the human condition and the actions or, lack there of, in so many people:

1. Fear Of Rejection

This is where people would rather “Go with the flow” to feel accepted than rather be an individual and risk doing that by themselves. I call this the Friendship Chameleon syndrome. So many people would rather fold their own sense of self to that of someone else and give full authority to someone else to speak for them and carry their persona because they simply don’t want to feel like they were rejected by that individual and or group.

“To fear love is to fear life, and those who fear life are already three parts dead.”
– Bertrand Russell

2. Fear of Loss

There is a very popular show that aired on A&E called “Hoarders”, where it chronicled the journey of people who held on to everything because they felt it helped them identify with their own self and/or it reminded them of happier times or people that have left them or their circle.

We do the same thing today with our jobs, our incomes, our relationships, and/or our networks. Instead of getting rid of the things that are no longer of value, bringing value, or solving our problems, we would rather pile them up, justify the “trash” and deal with it. This is because what we are really fearing is losing what we’ve always known to be reality instead of taking on a new challenge meant solely for us as the individual.

3. Fear of Failure

The most common of the big three, the fear of failure has frozen even the smartest and strongest of individuals. This is the cause of so many “stand still” or neutral feelings in our lives and businesses. So many people continue to manage their lives and businesses because it’s safe rather than raise our level of activity and go for broke to scale and create more income for ourselves or businesses due to the sense of failure if we don’t reach our ultimate goals.

What everyone needs to understand is that we will get rejected, we will lose something, and we will fail. It’s going to happen and recognising it early will help but, more importantly, let’s revert back to that old saying of “we can only control those things we can control.”

“If you know the enemy and know yourself you need not fear the results of a hundred battles.” – Sun Tzu

We can control our Fear of Rejection by building deeper networks and pipelines. We can control the Fear of Loss by dumping the things we don’t need or don’t want from our lives and businesses RIGHT NOW. We can control the Fear of Failure by creating so much activity in our lives and businesses that we no longer have the time or energy to even notice or focus on those times we fail.

The key to controlling ALL of these big 3 killers of progress of change is to simply go out and create opportunities, testimonials, and resumes of PROGRESS and CHANGE.

Quote for the day

"Every man who rises above the common level has received two educations: the first from his teachers; the second, more personal and important, from himself." - Edward Gibbon